Is it worth it?

     Being pregnant was not my favorite experience.  I remember hugging the toilet into the second trimester.  I wasn't able to keep things down...Vomiting everyday.  Feeling INVADED.  My body was being taken over.  I had no control.  I was now living my life for someone else's well being.  I could not be selfish even if I wanted to.  I remember wanting to get into the hot tub so bad.  I couldn't relax or sleep.  I had to lay on my left side, being a stomach sleeper that was hard for me.  This is not a pity party I am just sharing my experience.  Many women have gone through these very things, with less help, less resources... I can't imagine how is would have been hundreds of years ago.  I ate Tums like candy.  Acid reflux and heart burn were a common occurrence.  I couldn't eat anything for fear it would give me heart burn,  nothing greasy or spicy for sure!  There was no room to eat anything anyway.  My stomach could only fit tiny amounts in at a time.  That baby was huge, she took up every single space she could.   the end I couldn't even do up my pants.  I could feel the stretch marks forming.  I greased my stomach everyday in hopes to not get any.  The last two weeks, my stomach itched so bad.  Dark purple stretch marks began to form.  My fingers were so swollen I couldn't ware my wedding ring.  swollen toes and ankles.  My skin began to change.  Into the second trimester I looked like a raccoon.  Doctors call it chloasma,  the mask of pregnancy.  I also got acne on my back.  Whats this talk about the "glow!"  I never had the pregnancy glow.  I always felt ugly!  

Here I am from 4 months to 10 months. Ya it takes longer than 9 months to grow a baby!

     Then having the baby is  a whole different story.  I had a doctors appointment Oct. 25, 2010.  He checked everything and said I was ok.  He later told me that he agitated things a bit... I went home after eating my favorite Cavalier Pizza with pepperoni, Terrels sausage, mushroom and almonds.  

     I took a four hour nap, and woke up to strange cramps.  It felt like I was going to have my period.  I started to make dinner for Lloyd thinking nothing of it.  I wasn't due for two more weeks.  I kept myself busy.  I then got really sharp pains and a head ace.  the pains felt like my overies were going to explode.  I wasn't sure what was happening.  I then started to time the pains.  they were really close together... 5 to 7 mins apart.  They hurt so bad I had to sit down.  I thought in my head if I am already feeling pains like this I can't even imagine what contractions feel like... I thought contractions would hurt in a different place.  We never took a prenatal class so I was in the dark.  I did a lot of reading, but I wasn't quite prepared.  I even you-tubed a bunch of ladies having babies before hand so that I would know what to expect... I thought I was prepared. ha ha.  

     The pain was so bad that I almost puked.  I finally decided to go to the hospital.  We went in about 10:30 pm.  They took me right to the birthing room.  I was feeling a lot of pain and a lot of acid in my throat.  I knew I shouldn't have had so much for dinner.  I sat on the edge of the bed while the nurse was getting things ready.  I was terrified!! I didn't think I could do it.  I started to cry not knowing what was to come.  I called my sister Kristen ( she was in Korea at the time)  to help me through this.  She gave me a pep talk.  Lloyd tried but I wasn't sure he knew what I was going through.  I finally calmed down and the nurse started to get me ready for delivery.  she asked me a bunch of questions and put in my IV. 

     I asked for my Tums.  Donna my nurse (also roommate from college)  said she would give me some antacid through the IV.  This was a lot of firsts for me.  I had never had an IV a catheter, stayed in the hospital... or any real pain until now.  I then felt like I was going to puke again.... another contraction.  spew, splat, gasp... good thing Donna gave me a throw up bag.  I was going to go natural but after experiencing the pain I had already felt I didn't think that I could handle any more.  I was still waiting for contractions to start.  Silly me, I had no idea what was going on.  The nurse checked me and I was dilated to a 5.  It was then that I realized that I had ben having contractions all along.  They called in the annostiologist.  I wanted my pain level to be a 6 on a scale of 1 to 10.  He suggested a walking epidural.  I agreed.  Lloyd had to leave the room while I got the epidural needles and blood aren't his strong point.    

     I could still feel and move my legs, but the pain was not as edgy.  My doctor came in to check me and out slipped my water still in the bag.  I had been afraid of it breaking at the grocery store or something.  Luckily when it came out there was no mess.  Perfect!!! After the epidural my contractions slowed down a bit.  If it weren't for that I would have had that baby in 2 hours and her birthday would have been the 25th of October.  

     The contractions started to speed up again.  A couple of hours had come and gone.  Everything was happening so fast.  I proceeded to push.  I could feel almost everything.  I held my breath and pushed.  Lloyd was right at my side helping, and filming everything.  I grave it 5 good sets of pushing.  The last set was a doosy.  I could feel that the baby wasn't fitting!  I was done! It hurt so bad! I didn't want to push because I knew what was coming... more pain.  Doctor Cole had to give me a pep talk.  He said the babies head was right there all I had to do was push her out.  I felt her head with my hand.  She was there.  I could do this! It burned so bad.  I could feel my skin stretching.  It felt like an Indian burn.  I pushed the hardest that I have ever pushed, I screamed really loud (so lloyd says, I don't remember)  The pain was unreal!! burning and tearing.  Then I heard a little cry.  She had arrived.  Dr. Cole asked Lloyd if he wanted to cut the cord.  I cheered, "do it! do it!"  He wasn't planning on cutting it before hand.  He thought he was going to faint with all the mess, but he was strong and was right in there helping me along the journey of delivery.  He grabbed the scissors and "snip" cut the cord all while filming the event.  They put her right on my skin.  She was all slimy and purple.  She didn't really cry very much.  What a sweetie.  I had 3rd degree (out of 4) lacerations and hemorrhoids.  I was very sore.  I couldn't laugh, cough, sit or move it hurt so bad.  The Dr. began to give me stitches.  They hurt about as much as the delivery.  

     She was here.  What were we going to name her?  We had a list of 20 names that we liked.  We narrowed it down to 4.  One of the names we hadn't discussed, but i liked it.  It stuck out to me.  JACEY.  I asked my sister to look up the meaning.  She said that it meant happy.  Perfect we will name her Jacey!  I was on the phone with Kristen through Skype the whole delivery.  She was a big help especially at the beginning.  

     The staff was wonderful.  I love the Mt. Pleasant Hospital.  Everything was amazing they took good care of me!  The delivery took 40 mins and labor 4 hours.  Everything went really smooth.  and we have a happy healthy baby.  8 pounds 4 ounces.  20 inches long.  born at 2:19 am on October 26th, 2010.  My Mom played a game at my shower were we all had to guess the size, weight, and date of the baby.  I was the closest.  I guessed Oct. 30th, 20 inches and 8 pounds.  Wow talk about your inspiration.  If I would have waited two more weeks I would have ended up having a 10 pound baby.  

Here she is at 6 days old straight from heaven.  She is perfect!  All the things that I talked about before are canceled.  The sacrifice was worth it.  Tears come to my eyes as I realize she was in heaven not to long ago with our Heavenly Father.  I hope and pray that we can be good parents that raise her right and prepare her for life by teaching her the gospel.  She can make it back to live with her Heavenly Father.  We love her so much!  THE SACRIFICE WAS WORTH IT!